“Because St. Francis says, ask not to be consoled as much as to console. Ask not to be understood as to understand. Ask not to be loved as much as to love. And the more we can turn our attention outward—our compassion outward, our love outward—as opposed to demanding it inward, the better we’ll be at having successful and happy relationships.”
— From 10% Happier with Dan Harris: Handling Difficult People, Healing Breakups, and the Science of Talking to Strangers (with Shankar Vedantam), March 23, 2026
I’ve always loved the Prayer of St. Francis of Assisi—look it up if you haven’t read it before. I also really enjoy the 10% Happier with Dan Harris podcast, so I was glad to hear his guest this week, Shankar Vedantam (who also hosts Hidden Brain), talk about how he uses that prayer in his daily life and interactions.
Take note the next time you’re overthinking something—chances are, you’re thinking only about yourself. Lord knows we all do this. So today, pause and think of others first. It’s a simple shift that quickly resets your mindset and gets you back on track. It’s not always easy, but turning your attention outward helps you move onward.